Lilo & Loki
by Cappin Geraldine
Summary: Loki is banished to Midgard powerless, hungry, and completely mute after his trial. Story in progress. Loki learns the meaning of Ohana though the tremendously tedious teachings by a dark-skinned Midgardian urchin named Lilo. Lilo&Stitch AvengersMovie!Verse Parody/Cross-Over


**Title:** Lilo & Loki  
**Rating:** K+  
**Pairing:** None  
**Description:** Loki was banished to Midgard, powerless, hungry, and completely mute after his trial. If things couldn't have been worse, he also could never have predicted where he would end up. Lilo&Stitch Parody/Marvel Movie!Verse  
**Author's Notes:** I borrowed the idea of Loki being mute from Bombshell1701's fic: What Happens in Asgard. Loki's punishment was his mouth be literally sewn up with the magic thread of Brokkr, The Dvergr. After the iron needle and thread, he is rendered mute. When he is sent powerless to Midgard, the thread, the markings of the needle, and his voice are all gone.

...

To say it plainly: His back was sore.

That was his first concern waking up on the middle of a road at the dead of night. Loki, the Norse God of Mischief, Jotunn Son of Laufey: King of Frost-Giants, Adopted Son of Odin: King of Asgard, Catalyst Character of Mythology, Former-Ruler-of-Asgard, and Rightful-Ruler-Of-Midgard, grimly stared up at the starry night sky. He rubbed his forehead with his palm and regained his thoughts.

He was aching, powerless, and hungry (not to mention clothed in a most unflattering outfit of a baggy shirt and trousers). He was banished from Asgard without his powers after an excruciating trial of his previous actions with the Tesseract. Oh, he endured torture getting his mouth shewn shut too. He let his hands roam to his mouth. There were no markings or he just couldn't feel them at least. There was still an ache left by Brokkr's needle.

It wasn't his fault he mindlessly cherished the idea of redemption. It wasn't his fault he fell to the power of the Tesseract himself. Why didn't _they_ ever listen to him anyway? At least his mother and adopted bother still had some sympathy left running through her veins. Sure, he killed thousands and thousands of Midgardians letting the Chitari into Midgard. Loki sat up and folded his arms over his tucked legs. He ran his hand through his hair to comb out any weary, loose strands.

What was the point in all of this anyway? What lesson had he to learn? That killing a bunch of weak, petty mortals was a bad thing to do? (of course it was but besides the obvious point) That he should never rebel against authority? That the All-Father was the only person that really mattered in the nine realms? He chuckled at his dry sense of humor. The thought that he deserved this banishment ghostly wandered at the back of his mind, though, he pushed it out of his head menacingly.

A repetitive croaking at his side stole him from his self-pity. A strange, green, slimy-looking creature peered up at him with it's wide eyes. He cringed. He attempted to speak, though no words came out of his mouth. He grew frustrated and growled instead. The creature croaked in response. Loki folded his arms once more and huffed impatiently. He found it silly having a short staring contest with the creature, but continued to glare at it. What more could he do now? He was alone with a tiny creature in the middle of who-knows-where, and he couldn't talk either. Oh how he wished he could make due with a little more than a sound. But a growing light from behind Loki told him that the little guy at his side wasn't his only companion this evening.

...

Loki woke up with a sore back once again. Midgard wasn't being merciful in the slightest. He hated this place even more than he did the night previously. That.. was the night previously wasn't it? But this time he wasn't on the hard ground he was on before. It was softer, if not equally uncomfortable. He timidly opened his eyes.

Where on Midgard was he?

He could of sworn he wasn't inside a building when he fell from the Bi-frost. He got up from laying on a sofa to look around. The walls were paneled white, and the white wood flooring creaked under his bare feet. Large windows across from him displayed the outdoor tropical foliage in a bright afternoon light. Two exits on either side of the space showed a room with queer appliances and the other was an area across a narrow hallway with soft, roaring metal boxes with windows in them.

Loki ran his hands through his hair as he had the night before (?), straightening it out to its previous style. He felt a tender bruise forming on the back of his head and winced when he touched it. Loki also noticed he was in a different set of clothes, slightly better than the ones he arrived in Midgard with (a tightly fitted, and not to mention tacky, flower printed cotton shirt and a pair of beige trousers cut at the knee). At that moment a small, dark-skinned girl entered the room, and started brimming with excitement - much to his distaste.

"Oh! You're finally awake! Is your head feeling okay? I hope it is because you must of hit it really hard last night. You got hit by a huge car by the way!" She used the space between her hands to show how large it must have been.

What a 'car' was, Loki had no idea. It must have been a powerful threat to be only that size and knock him unconscious.

The girl continued, "At least, that's what David told me. Where did you come from? What were you doing on the road alone? You look like you're not from around here, are you a tourist? I brought you some coffee to make you feel better! Coffee is like magic!" The little one was firing questions at him like she hadn't all the time in the world. She couldn't possibly be serious! Loki frowned at the cup given to him filled with a steaming, dark brown concoction. Magic? What kind of magic could a mere mortal possess?

"Lilo!" An equally dark-skinned woman called from outside the room, making both of their faces turn to her. "The social worker is almost here! Are you even read-" she paused when she saw Loki sitting, perfectly conscious. "Oh! You're awake! I didn't think you'd actually be alive, to be honest!" she laughed nervously, "After what David told me when he found you last night. I'm Nani. And this is my sister-"

The little girl interrupted her older sister without batting an eyelash, "Lilo! What's your name?" Loki looked at the two girls curiously before deciding to respond adequately. And by 'adequately', Loki scowled. He couldn't talk. He showed them he couldn't too, doing his best using his free hand to demonstrate his lack of speech. Much to his surprise, Lilo gave him a smug-laced-look.

"You can't talk, can you?" Loki slowly shook his head. The little girl ran out of the room, coming in just a second later with a stubby, florescent pink writing tool and a pad of, what Loki would call, 'scroll'.

"Where'd you come from?" Nani asked. The two looked expectantly at Loki, eager to see what he'd write. Instead, he ignored the paper and suspiciously took a sip from the cup of "magical coffee" in his hand, only to spit it back into the mug like a child.

"Gross." Lilo commented. Loki cringed, placing the mug slowly back in the hands of the small girl, trading it for the pad and the crayon. "I guess you aren't a coffee person then. Don't worry! I'll find something else for you later!"

'_Are you trying to poison me?_' Loki wrote, showing it to the girl, pointing at 'poison' for emphasis. Lilo chuckled.

"You're funny!"

Loki scoffed and was about to write down some more but-

There was a knock at the door. Nani's expectant expression faltered as she went to answer it. The remaining two followed her slowly, Loki took with is communication device. The door revealed a large dark skinned man with sunglasses, dressed in a trim suit. He was holding a brief case and wore a sinister expression. After Nani greeted him, his demeaning gaze directed at Loki specifically. He reminded the Norse God of that Nick Fury character, from Thor's group of friends.

"New member of the family?" Not only his face reminded Loki of Fury, voice was just as menacing. Nani was completely flustered.

"Erm, yes actually! He's a distant relative from? From.. from Europe! Our uncle, erm, twice-removed! Yes, uncle twice-removed! He flew in just last night, and is really tired, as you can see." The man frowned slightly when he saw Loki's disgruntled expression.

"You never mentioned any distant relatives in the paper-work, Nani." He articulated his sentence perfectly as he spoke and left a dramatic pause when addressing her by name. Nani chuckled again.

"We haven't seen him in years! Right? I haven't seen you myself since I was only a kid like Lilo!" Nani looked back at him and winked. Loki didn't regard her wink in the slightest and wrote down on his pad of paper '_I am from the realm of Asgard. I was banished and of without my powers or voice. If you can, assist me at once you petty mortal._' The man frowned deeper reading the message. He couldn't take the European seriously after seeing he was using a pink crayola crayon and a pad of paper to tell him of all people that nonsense.

"Uncle Tom is an alien from outer space!" Nani covered Lilo's mouth and smiled nervously. Loki frowned, putting down his pad of paper to glare at the child. Did she just seriously refer to him as 'Tom'?

"Oh don't listen to her! She only met the man this morning, I can assure you it's just the culture differences!" The big man didn't look convinced, but his words told otherwise.

"The last time I came here it was a disaster, Nani. I expect you to convince me that you can take care of this child by tomorrow. And this European relative of yours must learn his manners, and prove to me he's not crazy- a model citizen if you will; one who deserves to vacation on this island. If you can't prove both of those to me, I'll take both of them away. Got it?" Without further ado, the man stiffly bid them a good day walking down the steps to his black vehicle. What did that strange mortal mean by 'model citizen'? And he had no right to call him 'crazy'! He spoke the mere bones of truth! Nani let go of Lilo's mouth and knelt down to see her eye to eye.

"That was too close Lilo! I thought we had already discussed this after what happened yesterday! He is not an alien! Why would you say that?"

Loki grimaced with frustration. Nani stretched her legs, keeping her hands on Lilo's shoulders.

"Who are you really?" she asked. Loki showed her his previous message. Nani didn't look like she believed him at all. Lilo read it and looked up at Nani with puppy-dog eyes.

"See! See! He must of fallen out of the sky because of my wish last night! Remember that big storm? That must of been where he fell! Nani? Can we keep him?"

'_I am not a material possession, you measly little urchin!_' Loki's pad of paper was ignored.

"Well.. if he wants to, Lilo. I mean, you don't have any place to go, do you Tom? Do you remember anything from before you got hit by that car?" He flipped his page back and showed her the message once more.

"Riiiiigggghhht. Well then, you are welcome to stay with us!" Nani declared. Loki shook his head.

Even so, he listened to reason after a few minutes of their pestering. He didn't want their pity, but where else could he go? No one would believe he wasn't from Earth anyway. He gave in to their bargain with a heavy sigh. Lilo smiled once again. According to Loki, this child was very peculiar.

"Uncle Tom-" Loki sighed in realization he was to be referred as that _god-awful_ name for the time being. "I'll show you around the island!" Lilo reached and took his hand so fast he dropped his pad of paper being dragged out the door by the little Midgardian girl. This was going to be a long day.


End file.
